Sunday, January 02, 2011

How to be a 20- something, Singaporean Style.

A friend showed me this article, How to be a 20- something, which brought a grin to my face. It was cheeky and yet relatable article that truly captured the thoughts of our age, although it probably applies more to American teens than us. So why not come up with one more relevant to Singaporeans? Out of sheer boredom, I thought why not tweak the original article slightly so we could identify with it more? I have to, however, clarify that I unfortunately spent most of my twenties outside of Singapore, and have actually not even completely 1/3 of the twenty- something journey. Nevertheless, I sincerely hope you would like my version anyway.

Here goes ...

Be really attractive. Your acne is gone, your face has matured without having wrinkles and everything on your body is lifted naturally. Eat Old Chang Kee and drink Koi Bubble Tea 7 days a week and still look like a babe/ hunk. Have 2 servings of roti prata with extra curry and sugar for supper. When you turn thirty, it’ll become a different story but that’s, like, not for a really long time.

Move into school hall, and burn all your time on RAG, hall play or going on random walks with your mates in the middle of the night. Take as many zi- pais (self- potraits)/ neoprints as possible. Sit in Macs or Starbucks for hours and talk about nothing important in general.

Stalk your crush on FB, join clubs and societies to widen your social circle and if you are lucky, he/ she might just be sitting opposite you whilst you are mugging in the library.

Work part time as a tutor or at (M)phosis because your allowance is not enough for a weekly Mambo night or to fund that 1 month trip to Europe you have been planning since forever. Be part of as many initiatives as possible, and stay hopeful that what you are doing makes a great deal of difference to the less fortunate. Remember that you’re young and that the world is your oyster. Everything is possible, you still have so much to see and hear. You went to a good school and did good things. Figure if you’re not going to be successful, who the hell is?

Date the people you never had the courage to even talk to in the past because your friends will go “Ah Beng and Ah Lian sitting on the tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G”. See someone for 3 months just because all your friends are too busy to watch movies with you.

Eventually all these nobodies will make you crave a somebody. Have a real relationship with someone. Go on vacations together, exchange house keys, cry in their arms after a demoralizing day at work. Think about marrying them and maybe even get engaged. Regardless of the outcome, feel proud of yourself for being able to love someone in a healthy way.

Start your twenties with a lot of friends and leave with a few good ones. What happened? People faded away into their careers and relationships.

Think of yourself at twenty and hanging out with people who didn’t mean a thing to you. Think about writing papers, about being promiscuous, about trying new things. Think of yourself now and your face looking different and your body feeling different and how everything is just different.

Form the habits that will stick with you forever. Drink your Kopi- Siew Dai every morning over Today/ Straits Times. Enjoy spending money on fine dining, go swimming every Saturday and have dim sum on Sunday morning.

Help your parents on Chinese New Year eve, prepare the steamboat and wear red. Remember Mother's Day and Father's Day and give a handmade card. This will all mean so much.

Think about having children when you stop acting like a child. This may not ever happen.

Maybe this is assuming too much. Maybe this is generalizing. Maybe society uses age as an unrealistic marker for growth. Maybe. Still feel the anxiety on your 30th birthday and think to yourself, “Oh shit, I’m no longer a 20-something.”

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