Christmas eve at Home.

Its christmas eve, and yet there is no festive mood in my household. Not that there ever has been, for xmas has never really had a special significance to us since we are neither angmoh nor christian. Now even more so, as I watch my younger brother growing up. Well, at least he once used to spend days like this at home but now, asking him out even for a family meal requires us to book in advance. It is now a given that he is not available unless otherwise stated. Hopefully, somehow he will miraculously get through this Im- the- king- of- the- world stage. I blame army- although i hear from people that the compulsory conscription in Singapore makes our dudes more mature, I suppose it can backfire in some cases yeah?

Since, its afterall a festive period, I should stop sounding so bitter cos my line- up for the day is really not so bad and it actually doesnt quite reflect my cheery mood (plus Im actually in Singapore, which makes Christmas, or any other day for that matter, 1000x better). Wakeboarding class in the late morning with my brother (and possible his mate), dinner at a Chinese restaurant in Chinatown (How ironic, considering its Christmas. But i will rather have this than turkey anytime.) with one of my best mates and still trying to find sometime to do in between.

Maybe I could break the tradition for myself and do some Christmas present shopping?

Home sweet Home.

As a I sit at my bar table having breakfast in shorts and T- shirt in lovely Singapore, reading this makes me count my blessings. By some stroke of luck, Gatwick opened for operations on the sunday i was flying home and it stopped snowing that very morning ... just for 1 day.

Although I have only been away for 13weeks, somehow it felt like almost half a year (if not more) has passed. Its not that I havent enjoyed my term, but it has been an exhausting one albeit exciting one. I found wingchun, much to the dismay of my mum, who promptly dragged me to the chinese sinseh after seeing all the bruises on my chest and hands. (We had to be punch bags for our respective partners to practise on. And my partner, S, is really one strong woman. The massive blue- black on my sternum speaks for itself.) Im more than glad that she was assured by him that not only is minor bruises and cuts part and parcel of martial arts, but that the basic stance of wingchun is a fantastic way for women to keep prolapse and osteoarthritis at bay.

So I begin my holidays, by getting my mum her new iphone4 (calculated that with viber and such, we would save more on long distance calls in the long run), wakeboarding classes with my brother (so rusty that Im aching all over now), visiting my Gran who is recovering very well from her knee surgery, a family Harry Potter outing and loads of kopi, kaya toasts, hokkien prawn mee, carrot cake, wanton mee and pork floss buns.

Keep fingers crossed for me that flights back to London will all be cancelled. I could really do with more than 10days in Singapore.

Back from Bas, finally!

I am finally back from my DGH (District General Hospital) posting at Basildon, and I cant say how happy I am about it. I guess being brought up in Singapore means that Im never really able to settle for a "peaceful" lifestyle. Moreover, I really didnt quite enjoy having to live in a hostel room again. It can be lonely, especially when I hardly know my neighbours (actually I barely do see them really) and when my idea of entertainment and fun doesnt quite match my firm mates'. This compared to a very lively London, with ready access to friends, internet (yes, I refused to pay for internet when I was at Bas) and great food and entertainment made having to go back to Bas the lowest point of my week. The travelling to and fro (at least 2 hours door to door, and at least 15pds return each time) was also a pain.

That being said, I wouldnt say that my time there was all downs and no pluses. Bas is a nice hospital, and I can see it being a great place to learn for medical students, by DGH standards. The people there are friendly, and the hospital is relatively big (at least bigger than I had expected it to be), with a snazzy new Cardiothoracic Centre (with its exterior seemingly modelled after UCH) and a very lively flow of patients. There was accommodation for students and staff on campus, which is great when you have to be in at 8 cos it means that you are able to roll out of bed at 7.30am and make it there in time or saunter back during lunch break for a nap. Its also great if you want a break from Labour Ward whilst waiting for your lady to pop the baby out, cos the very friendly midwives are more than happy to call you back for the deliveries (if they remember).

Of course, in terms of entertainment, med students seem to love Bas Vegas. Its a local club, which according to friends are nothing like the normal ones you see in London or anywhere else. Entrance was not too expensive (4-5pds, depending on whether you had your NHS card) and drinks are really cheap (1pd for a smirnoff ice, 1.5pd for a beer). The dance floor was close to being empty, and people would stare as you danced.

It was my virgin club experience here in UK, and I wont say its something that I see myself doing very often. Firstly, I feel just too self- conscious dancing (and should I say moving my body parts in awkward ways), and secondly, there is nothing else to do other than to dance and drink (neither of which i particularly like very much). But i suppose, as QZ said, I can see why people (other than those who genuinely like to dance) would like it, since its one of the few socially acceptable place to meet new people and talk to strangers.

Back in London now and feeling very pleased about it.

Started the celebrations by meeting my favourite mates at Vapiano for some pizza, pasta and laughs. There food here is really not too bad and for a really reasonable price. They do a Marche Concept kinda dining, whereby you order smthing and then whip it up for you on the spot. The Calzone I had was really pretty awesome and the staff that greeted me were awesomely friendly, which I feel very important in making a dining experience. Moreover, you can sit there for ages and they wont do anything about it. (I even saw a group of people playing board games there.)

Next up, would be Guy Fawkes celebrations for the weekend. Fireworks, here I come (:

Japan Fair at Brick Lane.

Handsome Boy, Qing Zhao. Please feel free to add him on FB.

Pretty Kiki. Best wife you can ever get. But sorry, unavailable.

Peish, that's the very awesome ... ME!

Peish, QZ, Kiki

All I can say is that Im glad we waited that long to have ourselves drawn (:

Only wished I had the skills to reproduce it again!

There is always hope.

Whoever said Year 4 would be a breeze should be shot. I'm in before 8 and rarely back before 6. And then there is still bookwork after that.

Well but I guess all I can do is to hang on tight and have faith. We will get there someday (:

Summer Hols

Not blogging for such a long time is a good thing. Partially because summer has been great to me and also cos the internet connection back at home in singapore is slow(er) and wireless isnt working, so the whole family has to queue for internet.

Now that Im back in London, waiting for school to start in 2 days time, I look back and Im glad to say Im happy with the way I have spent my summer hols. 2 spontaneous hols (I literally booked tickets and flew/ sailed 2 days later) and a relatively good attachment at CGH that gave me a better perspective of what it would be like to practise medicine back home in singapore.

Most importantly, I got to spend time with family and friends. Thats what makes home home aint it? But not enough, as always. It was a pity that I didnt manage to spend any time with SnR (although half of them are here in London anyway) but I did squeeze in a very lovely dinner and late night chat at Merlion Park with yearmates and loads of Losers time. Plus the HK trip to see my ex-flatmates, albeit over a very awkward dinner with archie's parents.

Summer, this year was good to me. It started with a lovely hol and ended with one too, and it makes me feel good to know that it wasnt all play and no work. Now, its time to start school again, which surprisingly, Im actually not dreading that much.

好兴奋！

最近不少歌手开始试着演戏，王力宏也终于被感染了。周董都能打入好莱坞，希望王力宏能超越它，演出佳绩。At least, he wont be speaking Chinglish in Hollywood films.

History for Dummies

WW2 Made Simple for Teens of Today- Facebook style

Love it when people can make history so interesting and accessible.

Singapore = Good Times

Been in Singapore for 3days and totally loving it.
Though Ive pretty much spent my days at home hoovering the house and washing dishes (maid went back to get married, just my luck), going down to Singtel multiple times to get my simcard fixed (couldnt receive any incoming calls and texts previously, so am sorry if i didnt reply you. Its not me being a diva, I am actually very friendly.) and meeting up with people. Which translates to wasting my life away. Which also means Im enjoying life really.

Good times. Only wishing that it could be a tad bit longer (:

I love the smell of Asia Air.

Here I am sitting in KL's airport, feeling so excited i might actually pee in my pants if not for the fact that Im way too dehydrated (blame expensive airport water) and that it might ruin my glamourous image.

Sitting here waiting for my gate to open, I cant help but let my mind drift and it has just occurred to me (albeit for the 1000th time) that another year has passed like this. I mean, I FINISHED ONE YEAR OF CLINICS?!

Two more years (hopefully) of this, and Im going to be a doctor. Like Dr Lee.

Like no more, Hi My Name Is Peishan Lee, I'm a third year medical student. Is it ok if I blah blah blah.

And no more, Im sorry Im not sure/ I dont know, Im a third year medical student.

Im looking way too far ahead, but this year just zoomed past. Its been fresh and exciting and yet challenging and at times draining. Afterall, life is not without its ups and downs. I have met people who made me laugh, made me cry, made me change my outlook and attitude in life. Im less tensed up, but that also means Im less disciplined. Im more open to changes and spontaneity but that equates to being disorganised as well. But I am trying, still, to strike a balance.

I shall breathe in the wet, humid Asia air and look forward to being home. Im glad Im going to be home in time to celebrate my nation's bday! Im starting to sound eerily patriotic. But oh well, A year is really a long time, especially so for "Homecoming Queen".

新加坡我来也。。。

Hi, I am a 3rd Year Medical Student ...

Peishan= Basal Skull Fracture + Diabetic Ketoacidosis + Hepatic Encephalopathy + Hashimoto's Disease

= Battle's Sign + Kaussmaul's Breathing + Korsakoff's Psychosis + Extreme Lassitude

And in non- medical speak= Big eye bags + hyperventilation + inability to make new memories + perpetual tiredness

Diagnosis: Medical Student

And there's always some truth in parodies ...

Orthopods and Anaesthetists (:

1 more reason why its better being a Woman.

Things I should not be remembering from my revision but tend to stick anyway:

"Research has shown that women who have complete transection of the spinal cord can experience orgasms through the vagus nerve, which can go from the uterus, cervix and probably the vagina to the brain."

I wanna be angmoh for a while.

I need a break real bad now, am physically and mentally drained.

Havent been so for a long long time. My ssc just has this effect on me, compounded with the nagging feeling that i have way too much to cover for exams.

And yet, there is so not enough time for me to take one proper.

Plus my mum (who is living with me now), seems to think tt it is only expected for us as students to work like this "because every medical student in the world has to work hard and they are all tired like you too. Plus, we are all also tired too."

But Im not one of those every other medical student in the world. And is it expected for everyone to be go so far as to be tired to be not considered lazy?

Once in a while, I wish Im not asian.

Peish the Physician.

I think the best thing I got out of doing my SSC on Breast surgery and oncology is that I have strengthened my resolve that I dont want to be a surgeon.

And that i hate writing essays alot.

Damn, it would have been interesting reading up on the history if breast cancer treatments if not for the fact that Im absolutely shattered from standing the whole day in theatre, that i havent slept much last night, and that the surgeon who is going to read it might possibly hate my essay and make me redo one.

I want to take a gap year. And my mum doesnt seem amused by it one bit.

Of Breast and Bad Luck.

At free-printing royal free now waiting for a wide local excision for (local) metastatic right breast lump to start in about 1-2hours, and really not looking forward to it.
Firstly because Im not a fan of surgery in general, and secondly because I dont like the idea of women losing boobs.

Spent the whole morning waiting for a ward round that didnt materialise to start, and then more waiting around with the pt to get a sentinel lymph node biopsy. But at least the radiologist was really nice and keen on teaching, which makes the moring pseudo- worthwhile. And my pt was really really nice and positive despite her diagnosis and that she is going to have part of her breast removed.

Breast Cancer is really an awful thing to have, both for men and women alike. Men because of the mockery they might get for having what the public see as a women's disease and women because it might mean losing a great part of their identity.
And its not only the physical changes that these pts have to deal with, but also chemo and radiotherapy after that. Its going to make (some) people lose hair, feel perpetually tired and ill, deal with side effects such as lymphoedema and having to live with the fear that the cancer might always recur. It means a whole lot not only to the pt but also her(/his) family. Daily routines disrupted and possibly life values reevaluated and plans rethought.
All these changes usu in a matter of weeks, if not days, especially with the one stop clinic that sees people getting their diagnosis within the week, surgery within the month and chemo, radio or hormonal therapy after that.

That aside, Im still feeling grouchy for having to come in so damn early to realise things didnt happen, the nurse at the lymphoedema clinic emailing the med sch to tell them i didnt attend the clinic and that squirrelmail is not working so i can email them to explain my innocence.
Why do bad luck come in big bundles?

Too much summer.

Summer is so beautiful, especially in a place whereby its normally cold and wet and gloomy. The beauty of the blooming flowers and the warmth of the sun, and the general joy expressed by the people in the streets just lifts my spirits.

But yesterday was one of those days, I wished the weather wasnt as summery. I was positively sweating like a pig and hyperventilating like a dog and missing my aircon back home in singapore the whole day.

But this weather does make me just not want to work (despite the fact that exams are coming up and no where near half way done) cos its either too beautiful to stay indoors or too hot to stay awake.

I guess thats just one of my 100001 excuses not to work.

And yes, today its the showdown between Spain and Netherlands. ((((: Am looking forward to it!

But Im def looking forward to going back home in 3 weeks time. Have plans to check out universal studios and marina sands with the Losers and possibly visit HK for a couple of days (((:

Inception.

Christopher Nolan makes me incredibly proud to say Im from UCL (yes, he graduated from my awesome school!).

And in about 10 days time, his newest work, starring none other than Leonardo DiCarprio (who might not be as good-looking as he was back when he was in Titanic, but more charming to watch with all the years of experience that has made him a truly awesome actor) and Ellen Page (who has really blossomed since June), comes INCEPTION:

And they are here to mess with your mind!

(Not that exams arent already doing so to mine.)

拳神

I think summer just has this effect on people.

It makes you want to just enjoy life and live the high life, which was exactly what i did- make a salmon pie for dinner, watch football (way to go Spain!) and then HK's (extremely embarrassing) version of The Matrix:

Or: 拳神

I have to admit I got into it 'cos of LeeHom.

Its bad, but hilariously so. A nice break if you need some laughs. And, they do have a nice cast (What i mean is ... yummy to the eyes).

But if you are looking for a show with any decent plot or acting or kungfu or meaning, dont say i didnt warn you first.

I guess we still have a long way before our movies would get anywhere near Hollywood's standards. (This movie came out 2 years after The Matrix.)

End of my World Cup Madness. Hopefully.

England's dismal performance against Germany has definitely motivated me away from watching every single match of world cup. Which is good, since its now officially less than 1mth from exams.

I guess it comes with living here in London, 'cos I have never been so passionate about any football team. Well, I did use to watch world cup and claim that I support Netherlands but never had I got so agitated with an unfair call or bad pass, and never had I known a team so well as this year's England's team. Football had never run my life (now my social appointments are organised around matches) and had never affected my 喜怒哀乐, but its a whole new ball game now (pun intended).

I suppose I never saw the need to be a fan of any team in the past, cos I was so preoccupied with my own school's sports teams. I remember going for almost all of RG's bball, swimming and track matches, and even more for HwaChong's matches and competitions especially since being in Council was an excuse to skip classes to go for them.

This year's world cup has been an interesting (albeit extremely disappointing for me) one.

With the news that Netherlands just won, i suppose it will still be exciting with Argentina, Netherlands and Germany still in the run.

Good friends, good food, good weather, good times.

Had a wonderful start to my lovely weekend with a dinner with Dada and Jamie at Villandry's yesterday. The food there was fab and the ambience real posh. The price was good as well, at 50% off on toptable.

And of course, catching up with old friends is always great. Jamie hasnt changed one bit- looks glam but still behaves in the most hilariously embarrassing way ever. Im totally looking forward to going home in Aug (:

Since my flatmate's off to Paris with her bf this wkend, I get the whole flat to myself. Which means that I get to do embarrassing (and guilty) things which I would normally not do with her about. Like waking up at an embarrassingly late hour, playing torchlight, finishing the whole tub of Haagen Daz, and watching silly commercials for hours on youtube.

Im surprised to find out Messi's not very much older than I am.

And that Kaka is an evangelical devout Christian who married his childhood sweetheart!

Summer makes everything beautiful (:

Once in a while, it really makes my day to know that I have made the right decision in choosing the right course at the right place.

It can really be such a joy to be reading about management of diseases, with my favourite oldies playing in the background, coke in hand and sun in my face in my lovely lovely new room.

Why why why the joy? I dont know either, but Im not complaining (:

Of World Cup and WWII.

Why the World Cup is like World War II?

The French Surrendered early.
US entered late.
The Brits are left to fight the Germans.

Bad luck comes in bundles.

Today is so not my day.

1. On take on a Sat. Only managed to get signed off 1h early.

2. Realised how little I know about medicine. Am def going to be screwed for exams.

3. Broke my toothbrush mug. Cut my finger whilst cleaning up the mess.

4. Spilt my hot choc all over my swanky new study chair.

And i dont want to know what comes next.

1 more day left to the end of my wkend. URGHS.

新家舒服得让我好松散。。。

好累哦。。。

老是睡睡睡，真不知是不是患了thyroid dysfunction了哦。

咳。

And a new life begins.

Didnt realise how tired I was until I have had time for a proper sleep.

Just woke up from my 3rd nap of the day, and 2nd cup of coffee and I feel like I can only possibly last for another 2 hours before Im going to KO.

And yesterday, I said goodbye to 2 of my dearest friends. It was emotional, but at least Im thankful that this year I have met people that I have met people whom I am able to say weepy goodbyes to. I must have said bye to S for about one thousand and one times which started from Schafer to the tube station to the airport itself to the departure gantry to the multiple calls as she waited for the plane to take off.

And now, I look at the Torchlight icon at my dock, and I dont feel that great an urge to play it anymore. Not just cos I dont own a mouse, but because, there isnt someone to share the joy with me when I find smthing new.

Its odd saying this, esp when its 1mth to exams and nowhere near the start or the calendar year or academic year, but now its time to put things behind and start afresh. I must be blessed to have the most awesome new apartment and new flatmate I could possibly ask for.

And now, lets all cross our fingers and hope that I am going to be able start catching up and make it up in time for a whole year of not working.

再见。。。

One more day to go.

那就这样吧，是 sayonara 的时候了。。。

I hate Packing.

Packing is a bitch.

Have been spending the past god knows how long and Im only 1/3 my way through my room.

I suppose I have myself to blame mostly for having SO much junk. I possibly (literally) have 5x the amt of stuff my geek gamer neighbour has. Its getting to an embarrassing state really. I do have a feeling that Kiki isnt going to be too happy when she sees the amount of rubbish i have.

Doesnt help that my mum and gran left a whole load of their stuff here, clothes which i wont wear and stuff which I dont use.

And my mum aint keen on my giving them all away. Which means they would continue to lie there rotting.

And packing means leaving.

Im def going to miss it here. Though, at least I do really look forward to living in my new place and with a new flatmate (:

PMS.

I wonder if Im suffering from PMS now.

Didnt have any mood to do anything at all today. Gave up very quickly after a half hearted attempt to work, Im playing torchlight and yet not really enjoying it much. Have been like this for the past 8hrs or so? But before wagging the finger and telling me that I aint no more teenager and I should not get all emo and such, I think i have definitely done a great job in looking happy :D

And despite my laughs and the wide grin on my face, I feel lonely.

I know people dont mean it when they niao me, but today is the day when I take it literally and act like I dont mind the insults (or should I say cold harsh truth) but I do.

And i know, Im supposed to still laugh it off and not spoil things. Afterall, this is what everyone would expect of the Peishan they know.

I know Im supposed to be cheery and non- chalant and take everything in my stride,

But today aint the day.

And today, I miss home. Terribly much.

考试期间，暑假心情。

咳，真的好没心情读书哦！

真希望暑假能马上来。不是不喜欢上学，只是不喜欢为了考试而念书。

And i hereby give up typing in Chinese. Cant get a half decent msg across at all.

Performance and Mastery Motivation

Today my neighbour taught me, or should i say reminded me, something about what drives people. The drive to excel which I think I have seem to lost as the years went by.

The idea of mastery motivation is one 境界 which I would like myself to eventually reach- to learn because I want to , because I want to better myself, because I want to be a better doctor, because I want to know about about the world around me, to understand why it is the way it is and to know how I can make a difference. I know Im on the path and I want to, as Steve Jobs once told Stanford, to always stay hungry and stay foolish.

Torchlight

Im now positively, irreversibly, hopelessly addicted to this stupid new RPG game Torchlight which my geeky flatmate Archie introduced to me. Im becoming Morgan Grimes.

It has gotten to such a terrible stage whereby I look out of the window and its bright and the next time I look out again it is bright too. I have stooped to the level of asking a bimbo qn like "Does the sun ever set in Summer?"

That aside, Im otherwise loving life. Gen Med spec is awesome, the consultants fab and the workload just about right. Life back in the flat is almost like being home. And the weather is getting warmer.

Things are def quite cheery ...

My only want is for medical knowledge to just diffuse into my head.

Omg, its Mid- May!

Today is one of those days where my Piscean personality sets in- I get (embarrasingly) emotional. Not the head- banging/ dont- talk- to- me mood swings (I would in fact still look perfectly fine if you had walked into my room right now), but more like Im suddenly irrationally overwhelmed with a sense of homesickness. All this emotions for not much of a reason- not PMS, not 'cos Im getting bullied, not 'cos school work is screwing me over (though I have to admit Im not in the best state right now) and not 'cos Im not getting along with the people around me.

Maybe its the flu.

Time is passing way too quickly, its now Mid- May and its almost the end of year 3, the end of living in halls with a bunch of very interesting characters and the coming of the final exams proper. Im going to miss them. And I really do wonder what it would be like in future, if I would still actually keep in touch with them or do our lives just move on, with this 1 year staying as a memory which I would look back at and smile.

Now I am to move on and stop being all wishy- washy; I have indulged myself enough.

You know that when I update, Im supposed to be studying.

Time passes way too quickly. I was just reminded recently by Prisc that she'll be over here in London in 1 wk's time, and I cant believe how in 1 wk's time i would have gone through 3/4 of my third year.

What scares me most is that before i know it, i would be graduating soon and that I would be let lose on the wards with all these gaps in my knowledge, and my inability to actually do a proper examination and interpret/ elicit signs. And I would soon have to make decisions on which specialties I like, and where I would like to work, and what to do with my life in general. These are definitely scary decisions to make. As much as I hate to admit it, I definitely have one foot into adulthood now, if not both. The thought of having to deal with rents and office politics and I dont know what else is freaky.

This year has been an interesting year for me in many ways. Its not smooth sailing (you know it when Im putting on weight since Im sucha comfort eater) but Im still glad I had the chance to experience it. At least, I could say that I have never been bored.

Easter Break ... finally!

Firstly (and most importantly) Thanks Boobie and Babe for the Bday card! It totally made my day, cant say how it totally made the start of my easter break perfect (((:

Just back from an awesome lunch at Launceston Place to kickstart what i hope would be a great Easter break (although its only 1 pathetic break). The Gloucester Old Spot Pork was seriously one of the best pork dishes I have had in my life. The thin layer of fat under the crispy skin literally melts in your mouth. Absolutely heavenly! :D The lunch menu was really value, 20pounds for a 3 course meal (though they do add in a pre- starter and pre- dessert and free flow of bread on the house).

Gordon Ramsay is def next on my list of to try list.

Heading up to York for a couple of days, looking forward to trying out all the good food that dj has been talking about. And also shopping at the outlet! :D

Countdown to Easter Break.

The past week or so has literally been a bday celebration week (afterall, this is only whats expected for a princess).

But for those who are still vexing on what to get me for my bday, please ...

1. DONT get my any more food. Im in need of a diet.

I would however appreciated:

1. Tuning Fork sets: 512Hz +/- 128Hz ones

2. Ophthalmoscope set

Actually any form of sponsorship would do cos i know how ridiculously expensive medical equipments are!

Films, Films ... and more Films!

Why am I up at 4am and was asleep at 7.30pm?

My body clock is like officially screwed, which signifies Ive finally succumbed to following the lifestyles of most normal university students.

Im trying to decide if its quite loser to go watch movies on my own, cos there are so many shows now that I wanna catch:

1. Invictus

2. Green Zone

3. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

4. Crazy Heart ... on DVD maybe

And shows coming up that I would like to catch:

1. How to train your dragon ... 3D!

2. Clash of the Titans ... 3D!

3. Kick- Ass

4. Nanny McPhee

And recent films that I think are worth watching (for you Boobie):

- The Hurt Locker (there is a reason why this is a big winner at the Oscars)

- Alice in the Wonderland 3D (cos its 3D and there's Johnny Depp. But dont get your hopes up cos it really was quite disappointing)

I couldnt quite appreciate Precious too much myself, despite all the rave reviews about it.

Everyone loved Up in The Air, but other than George Clooney I didnt quite like it that much.

I liked From Paris with Love, which is not a romantic film (but a thriller) despite its title. And since Bend it Like Beckham, I havent watched a Johnathan Rhys Meyer film for quite some time.

And Im waiting for the DVDs for Valentine's Day and Percy Jackson to come out.

Ok this is not a good sign at all considering I have already been on a 2 month work hiatus. Something possibly unheard of in Singapore, or amongst Singaporeans really.

Burnt Out.

The 4h nap I just had was awesome! Though it means that it has completely screwed up my sleeping schedule, and doubly worse cos I had it after a very very huge lunch (which is not a good idea considering Im in a perpetual uphill battle to lose weight).

I was kinda feeling a little burnt out ever since I transferred to the Whit. Im not sure if Im not used to the long hours, travelling time or just a new (extremely) keen firm. They just keep going on. Or is it just me not being able to sleep well at night. And I have reached a point in time, whereby Im quick sick of trying to make friends. I like making friends, only when its comes naturally, and not having to rack your brains all the time to find conversation or laugh at in-my-opinion-not-so-funny things. 3 years on, and I still feel the culture shock sometimes. I give Stef (and some others) full credit for being able to blend in so well and so easily. Maybe its just me who's resistant to change?

And all these on top of trying to get on top of my work, which is lagging to quite an embarrassing stage, going to the gym (to lose the pounds Ive put on since ... I cant even rem when was it that i ate in moderate amts) and still having a social life.

That being said, Im still looking fwd to the fun and meals this weekend, and my bday next week. And then it would be Easter break (although its a pathetic 1wk long), when I would be heading to York :D

I was deciding between studying or going to the gym, and Ive just spent an hour online.

Ok, maybe discipline is my problem.

The Blind Side

This movie is so good that i managed to stay awake and love it although I havent had sleep for the past 36h (blame night takes).

Based on a true story, it is def one of those feel good inspirational films you'll need to get your through half- term.

There's good ol' Sandra Bullock, whom I havent seen produce a good film in quite some time, who does the thing she does best and shows us how it can be so beautiful to age gracefully. She has managed to take on a mature motherly figure role and yet, make boys fantasize about her at the same time (not that i do, but i would if i was a guy).

The performances by the others were great as well, and best of all, all these feel good fuzzy stuff is based on something that has happened around us. This is an awesome story that is born 'cos someone has a great heart to make a difference to people around her.

虽然我们相识无言中 彼此情谊不深 心灵却相通

HC Night ytd was amazing! :D The food was alright (though portions generous, which was great for hungry people like me. But not good cos we were in glam dresses and not supposed to stuff ourselves silly) but the company was really really what made the night so awesome. So many of the councillors came down from all parts of Europe (Jamie, Kailing, Gloria, Hon) and then Stef, Wenxi and Charm from Oxbridge and then there were the Londoners- Mark, Dawei, Paul, Xun. We managed one whole table, how amazing is that!

Its nice to see changes in some people (cos it was for the better), and that some people havent changed one bit (which is great too).

But the downside to these kinda events is that there are so many people that I kinda know but i dont really know, and I dont quite know what to say after the usual Hi, how have you been or Your outfit's amazing. So I just end up sitting at my table, and talking to the same few people (which is actually, to be quite honest, what i really want to do. After all, i havent seen these friends of mine for what seems like ages.)

Got woken up this morning by Kenneth at 7-ish who came barging into my room, with Mac's breakfast. It was a nice feeling being brought breakfast, and talking to him considering that though we barely live more than 10mins apart, I dont think Ive actually seen him much.

Fell asleep right after Big Breakfast, and got woken up again in time to join my flatmates for Yum Cha at Chinatown. I think amongst the 5 of us, we ordered more than 20dishes. We were literally ordering without thinking much. Added up to 70ish in all for all of us, thats how much we had. But it was def a good meal :D Its been quite some time since I have properly hung out with my flatmates, since I was so busy running about with my family and all.

But it reminded me, how much I really like them :D

Mixed Feelings

Just a quick entry 'cos Im having mixed feelings about my brother going back home. I think Im going to miss the arguing with him, listening to him talk about how cheeky he has been and the silly things that goes on in school and also about girls in general. Im def going to miss bossing him about and having fights and knowing tt at the end of the day 'cos we are sibs things will always be fine.

But i guess its time to get on track and get some work done, esp with a new term starting. Have been jetting about and been out of school more than Im in (not good since Im supposed be a full time student, and a med student as that). Oh and also, stop eating so much and get some exercise and LOSE SOME WEIGHT :( Wished I could be someone who would be able to eat loads and loads and not put on any weight.

HC Night this Sat. Looking forward to seeing the councillors. At least that would brighten up my spirits a little after my brother leaves.

Hongbaos for Haiti

Firstly, just let me explain my hiatus.

My fam was around and its been such a crazy time with all the weekend trips to Madrid and Amsterdam and what not. Then I was hit by a bad headache which pretty much left me useless for days.

My work is currently in the most devastated state. I havent clerked any patients for 1 whole week, and this has been observed by my profs, which is utterly embarrassing.

But it is CNY after all, which perks me up a bit, though I dont quite get the atmosphere here in London. But im not complaining much cos it is nice to have my brother and alvin around to spend it with this year. I wish it wouldnt be so cold here though. Just when I thought it was getting nice and warm.

Anyway, Ive decided that this year, Im going to be doing something meaningful for CNY, after reading abt the Haiti Earthquake.

So, here I am, blatantly canvassing for support for my baby fundraising project for the kids affected by the Earthquake.

Hongbaos for Haiti

Basically, my good friend Stef and I have decided that this year we would be pledging part of our Hongbao money for UNICEF, who is involved in the relief missions in Haiti, following the Earthquake country on 12th of Jan.

Haiti is the poorest country in the western hemisphere and half of its population are under 21years old. Although rescue missions are starting to end, funds are urgently needed for rebuilding and to provide safe water, temporary shelter systems, essential medical supplies etc. UNICEF concentrates their works on orphans, young children and their mothers. As we all know, these people are usually the ones who are most vulnerable in such disasters.

So here I am, appealing to all of you, no matter where you are in the world, to extend a little of your kindness as you enjoy this festive season to these people. Please join our FB group to help spread the msg, and you can make your donation via this website.

What we hope is that, you would not only make the donation, but leave a personal msg for your friends to do the same. No amt is too little, and telling 1 other friend is also great help! And hopefully, together all of us would be able to raise a substantial amt by the end of the CNY.

Here's wishing everyone an awesome chinese new year! 新年快乐！

Family's going to be in Town!

Part of me is super excited about my family coming tmr, but another part of me is totally not excited that my brother's friends are going to be staying in my room. Everyone that I have told me about has gone "Harrr? Your room how to squeeze another 3 more humans?"

Yar, like seriously God knows why my brother invited 2 more dudes. And my hunch is that they are not cute, which totally doesnt help. (Sorry, I am superficial.)

Had a pretty damn good weekend of superb food (celebrated Carmen's Bday at Indigo at One Aldwych), and watched tons of movies. (6 in a row.)

And if you havent watched it yet, The Hurt Locker is really quite fantastic :D

职业病

Im watching Indiana Jones now, and the first thing that I think of when I heard Scorpion Bite was ... A rare cause of Acute Pancreatitis.

Sigh, 真的患了职业病.

-

Anyway, does anyone have any recommendations of any good movies? :D

Just watched Up yesterday (I know Im slow), and I feel bad for saying this but I think I only didnt like it that much cos I was truly extremely annoyed by the fat korean boy.

Staying Foolish, Staying Hungry.

Today, I think I refound my enthusiasm for medicine. Its not that Ive ever hated medicine at any point of time, but once in a while, I find it hard to remain super-keen (something that should have been built into every singaporean, much less someone from the schools ive been to) or even worse, to actually attended scheduled lessons.

But today, as I held the hand of a confused man and managed to get him to listen to me and to calm down, I am reminded that this is actually something that I really want to do. And that Im never going to be a good doctor and make a difference if I dont put in the hard work. No work, no gain.

Something that my GP said to me today really struck me- He said that sometimes, all you need to do to deal with hyperventilation, is to hold your patients hand and breathe with them.

And that was what I did with a terrified old lady with such battered hands cos so many people has failed to get blood from her tiny veins (Ken did a lovely job at finding it though), and with the aforementioned confused old man, and I actually felt like I finally did make a difference as a medical student. Not just another self- centred brat, roaming the wards so that I can pass my finals. As Steve Jobs said to Stanford, I do hope that I would be able to Stay foolish, Stay hungry for as long as possible.

Avatar!

I know I must have looked like I dropped off from the face of Earth, but I think I might just have valid excuses for it.

I finally sent my lovely sexay Mac for repair at the awesome Genius Bar 'cos it kept crashing on me. (My poor lady suffered 5mths of epileptic shocks.) They took more than 2 weeks to get back to me even though they promised 10days.

After that, it was preparation for the highly disastrous exam I look yesterday. I felt like I have pretty much wasted my time studying for the paper.

I mean I was laughing as I walked out of the hall, cos its one of those papers which Im pretty damn sure I failed. It was basically a paper which tested the whole year's work as a practice for our end of years, but there were almost like zero surgery questions, which is basically the only thing which I have done properly. Cant say how depressing it was to flip through pages after pages of rheumatology (God help me on this.), skin problems, illnesses associated with the elderly and Gen Med Spec stuff :( Oh and not to forget histology. I dont admit those pink stuff aint pretty, but after 2.5years I really still have no idea what those blobs are man.

Decided to go watch Avatar: The Movie in 3D after that. And it was pretty damn awesome! :D

It was a pity we missed the first 20mins of it though (cos we were too hungry and greedy and thought that its unforgiveable to miss dinner even if it meant missing part of the show). I think I might actually go back to watch it in 2D, and get the DVD (extra footages!) when it comes out.

Going for Indian tonight with the councillors cos Hon is popping by from Lyon. Looking forward to some curry, esp in this awfully cold weather.

And Im so going to get all those movies from my flatmates and cuddle up in bed and catch up on what I have missed for the past, what feels like almost eternity.