End of my World Cup Madness. Hopefully.

England's dismal performance against Germany has definitely motivated me away from watching every single match of world cup. Which is good, since its now officially less than 1mth from exams.

I guess it comes with living here in London, 'cos I have never been so passionate about any football team. Well, I did use to watch world cup and claim that I support Netherlands but never had I got so agitated with an unfair call or bad pass, and never had I known a team so well as this year's England's team. Football had never run my life (now my social appointments are organised around matches) and had never affected my 喜怒哀乐, but its a whole new ball game now (pun intended).

I suppose I never saw the need to be a fan of any team in the past, cos I was so preoccupied with my own school's sports teams. I remember going for almost all of RG's bball, swimming and track matches, and even more for HwaChong's matches and competitions especially since being in Council was an excuse to skip classes to go for them.

This year's world cup has been an interesting (albeit extremely disappointing for me) one.

With the news that Netherlands just won, i suppose it will still be exciting with Argentina, Netherlands and Germany still in the run.

Good friends, good food, good weather, good times.

Had a wonderful start to my lovely weekend with a dinner with Dada and Jamie at Villandry's yesterday. The food there was fab and the ambience real posh. The price was good as well, at 50% off on toptable.

And of course, catching up with old friends is always great. Jamie hasnt changed one bit- looks glam but still behaves in the most hilariously embarrassing way ever. Im totally looking forward to going home in Aug (:

Since my flatmate's off to Paris with her bf this wkend, I get the whole flat to myself. Which means that I get to do embarrassing (and guilty) things which I would normally not do with her about. Like waking up at an embarrassingly late hour, playing torchlight, finishing the whole tub of Haagen Daz, and watching silly commercials for hours on youtube.

Im surprised to find out Messi's not very much older than I am.

And that Kaka is an evangelical devout Christian who married his childhood sweetheart!

Summer makes everything beautiful (:

Once in a while, it really makes my day to know that I have made the right decision in choosing the right course at the right place.

It can really be such a joy to be reading about management of diseases, with my favourite oldies playing in the background, coke in hand and sun in my face in my lovely lovely new room.

Why why why the joy? I dont know either, but Im not complaining (:

Of World Cup and WWII.

Why the World Cup is like World War II?

The French Surrendered early.
US entered late.
The Brits are left to fight the Germans.

Bad luck comes in bundles.

Today is so not my day.

1. On take on a Sat. Only managed to get signed off 1h early.

2. Realised how little I know about medicine. Am def going to be screwed for exams.

3. Broke my toothbrush mug. Cut my finger whilst cleaning up the mess.

4. Spilt my hot choc all over my swanky new study chair.

And i dont want to know what comes next.

1 more day left to the end of my wkend. URGHS.

新家舒服得让我好松散。。。

好累哦。。。

老是睡睡睡，真不知是不是患了thyroid dysfunction了哦。

咳。

And a new life begins.

Didnt realise how tired I was until I have had time for a proper sleep.

Just woke up from my 3rd nap of the day, and 2nd cup of coffee and I feel like I can only possibly last for another 2 hours before Im going to KO.

And yesterday, I said goodbye to 2 of my dearest friends. It was emotional, but at least Im thankful that this year I have met people that I have met people whom I am able to say weepy goodbyes to. I must have said bye to S for about one thousand and one times which started from Schafer to the tube station to the airport itself to the departure gantry to the multiple calls as she waited for the plane to take off.

And now, I look at the Torchlight icon at my dock, and I dont feel that great an urge to play it anymore. Not just cos I dont own a mouse, but because, there isnt someone to share the joy with me when I find smthing new.

Its odd saying this, esp when its 1mth to exams and nowhere near the start or the calendar year or academic year, but now its time to put things behind and start afresh. I must be blessed to have the most awesome new apartment and new flatmate I could possibly ask for.

And now, lets all cross our fingers and hope that I am going to be able start catching up and make it up in time for a whole year of not working.

再见。。。

One more day to go.

那就这样吧，是 sayonara 的时候了。。。

I hate Packing.

Packing is a bitch.

Have been spending the past god knows how long and Im only 1/3 my way through my room.

I suppose I have myself to blame mostly for having SO much junk. I possibly (literally) have 5x the amt of stuff my geek gamer neighbour has. Its getting to an embarrassing state really. I do have a feeling that Kiki isnt going to be too happy when she sees the amount of rubbish i have.

Doesnt help that my mum and gran left a whole load of their stuff here, clothes which i wont wear and stuff which I dont use.

And my mum aint keen on my giving them all away. Which means they would continue to lie there rotting.

And packing means leaving.

Im def going to miss it here. Though, at least I do really look forward to living in my new place and with a new flatmate (:

PMS.

I wonder if Im suffering from PMS now.

Didnt have any mood to do anything at all today. Gave up very quickly after a half hearted attempt to work, Im playing torchlight and yet not really enjoying it much. Have been like this for the past 8hrs or so? But before wagging the finger and telling me that I aint no more teenager and I should not get all emo and such, I think i have definitely done a great job in looking happy :D

And despite my laughs and the wide grin on my face, I feel lonely.

I know people dont mean it when they niao me, but today is the day when I take it literally and act like I dont mind the insults (or should I say cold harsh truth) but I do.

And i know, Im supposed to still laugh it off and not spoil things. Afterall, this is what everyone would expect of the Peishan they know.

I know Im supposed to be cheery and non- chalant and take everything in my stride,

But today aint the day.

And today, I miss home. Terribly much.

考试期间，暑假心情。

咳，真的好没心情读书哦！

真希望暑假能马上来。不是不喜欢上学，只是不喜欢为了考试而念书。

And i hereby give up typing in Chinese. Cant get a half decent msg across at all.

Performance and Mastery Motivation

Today my neighbour taught me, or should i say reminded me, something about what drives people. The drive to excel which I think I have seem to lost as the years went by.

The idea of mastery motivation is one 境界 which I would like myself to eventually reach- to learn because I want to , because I want to better myself, because I want to be a better doctor, because I want to know about about the world around me, to understand why it is the way it is and to know how I can make a difference. I know Im on the path and I want to, as Steve Jobs once told Stanford, to always stay hungry and stay foolish.

Torchlight

Im now positively, irreversibly, hopelessly addicted to this stupid new RPG game Torchlight which my geeky flatmate Archie introduced to me. Im becoming Morgan Grimes.

It has gotten to such a terrible stage whereby I look out of the window and its bright and the next time I look out again it is bright too. I have stooped to the level of asking a bimbo qn like "Does the sun ever set in Summer?"

That aside, Im otherwise loving life. Gen Med spec is awesome, the consultants fab and the workload just about right. Life back in the flat is almost like being home. And the weather is getting warmer.

Things are def quite cheery ...

My only want is for medical knowledge to just diffuse into my head.

Omg, its Mid- May!

Today is one of those days where my Piscean personality sets in- I get (embarrasingly) emotional. Not the head- banging/ dont- talk- to- me mood swings (I would in fact still look perfectly fine if you had walked into my room right now), but more like Im suddenly irrationally overwhelmed with a sense of homesickness. All this emotions for not much of a reason- not PMS, not 'cos Im getting bullied, not 'cos school work is screwing me over (though I have to admit Im not in the best state right now) and not 'cos Im not getting along with the people around me.

Maybe its the flu.

Time is passing way too quickly, its now Mid- May and its almost the end of year 3, the end of living in halls with a bunch of very interesting characters and the coming of the final exams proper. Im going to miss them. And I really do wonder what it would be like in future, if I would still actually keep in touch with them or do our lives just move on, with this 1 year staying as a memory which I would look back at and smile.

Now I am to move on and stop being all wishy- washy; I have indulged myself enough.

You know that when I update, Im supposed to be studying.

Time passes way too quickly. I was just reminded recently by Prisc that she'll be over here in London in 1 wk's time, and I cant believe how in 1 wk's time i would have gone through 3/4 of my third year.

What scares me most is that before i know it, i would be graduating soon and that I would be let lose on the wards with all these gaps in my knowledge, and my inability to actually do a proper examination and interpret/ elicit signs. And I would soon have to make decisions on which specialties I like, and where I would like to work, and what to do with my life in general. These are definitely scary decisions to make. As much as I hate to admit it, I definitely have one foot into adulthood now, if not both. The thought of having to deal with rents and office politics and I dont know what else is freaky.

This year has been an interesting year for me in many ways. Its not smooth sailing (you know it when Im putting on weight since Im sucha comfort eater) but Im still glad I had the chance to experience it. At least, I could say that I have never been bored.

Easter Break ... finally!

Firstly (and most importantly) Thanks Boobie and Babe for the Bday card! It totally made my day, cant say how it totally made the start of my easter break perfect (((:

Just back from an awesome lunch at Launceston Place to kickstart what i hope would be a great Easter break (although its only 1 pathetic break). The Gloucester Old Spot Pork was seriously one of the best pork dishes I have had in my life. The thin layer of fat under the crispy skin literally melts in your mouth. Absolutely heavenly! :D The lunch menu was really value, 20pounds for a 3 course meal (though they do add in a pre- starter and pre- dessert and free flow of bread on the house).

Gordon Ramsay is def next on my list of to try list.

Heading up to York for a couple of days, looking forward to trying out all the good food that dj has been talking about. And also shopping at the outlet! :D

Countdown to Easter Break.

The past week or so has literally been a bday celebration week (afterall, this is only whats expected for a princess).

But for those who are still vexing on what to get me for my bday, please ...

1. DONT get my any more food. Im in need of a diet.

I would however appreciated:

1. Tuning Fork sets: 512Hz +/- 128Hz ones

2. Ophthalmoscope set

Actually any form of sponsorship would do cos i know how ridiculously expensive medical equipments are!

Films, Films ... and more Films!

Why am I up at 4am and was asleep at 7.30pm?

My body clock is like officially screwed, which signifies Ive finally succumbed to following the lifestyles of most normal university students.

Im trying to decide if its quite loser to go watch movies on my own, cos there are so many shows now that I wanna catch:

1. Invictus

2. Green Zone

3. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

4. Crazy Heart ... on DVD maybe

And shows coming up that I would like to catch:

1. How to train your dragon ... 3D!

2. Clash of the Titans ... 3D!

3. Kick- Ass

4. Nanny McPhee

And recent films that I think are worth watching (for you Boobie):

- The Hurt Locker (there is a reason why this is a big winner at the Oscars)

- Alice in the Wonderland 3D (cos its 3D and there's Johnny Depp. But dont get your hopes up cos it really was quite disappointing)

I couldnt quite appreciate Precious too much myself, despite all the rave reviews about it.

Everyone loved Up in The Air, but other than George Clooney I didnt quite like it that much.

I liked From Paris with Love, which is not a romantic film (but a thriller) despite its title. And since Bend it Like Beckham, I havent watched a Johnathan Rhys Meyer film for quite some time.

And Im waiting for the DVDs for Valentine's Day and Percy Jackson to come out.

Ok this is not a good sign at all considering I have already been on a 2 month work hiatus. Something possibly unheard of in Singapore, or amongst Singaporeans really.

Burnt Out.

The 4h nap I just had was awesome! Though it means that it has completely screwed up my sleeping schedule, and doubly worse cos I had it after a very very huge lunch (which is not a good idea considering Im in a perpetual uphill battle to lose weight).

I was kinda feeling a little burnt out ever since I transferred to the Whit. Im not sure if Im not used to the long hours, travelling time or just a new (extremely) keen firm. They just keep going on. Or is it just me not being able to sleep well at night. And I have reached a point in time, whereby Im quick sick of trying to make friends. I like making friends, only when its comes naturally, and not having to rack your brains all the time to find conversation or laugh at in-my-opinion-not-so-funny things. 3 years on, and I still feel the culture shock sometimes. I give Stef (and some others) full credit for being able to blend in so well and so easily. Maybe its just me who's resistant to change?

And all these on top of trying to get on top of my work, which is lagging to quite an embarrassing stage, going to the gym (to lose the pounds Ive put on since ... I cant even rem when was it that i ate in moderate amts) and still having a social life.

That being said, Im still looking fwd to the fun and meals this weekend, and my bday next week. And then it would be Easter break (although its a pathetic 1wk long), when I would be heading to York :D

I was deciding between studying or going to the gym, and Ive just spent an hour online.

Ok, maybe discipline is my problem.

The Blind Side

This movie is so good that i managed to stay awake and love it although I havent had sleep for the past 36h (blame night takes).

Based on a true story, it is def one of those feel good inspirational films you'll need to get your through half- term.

There's good ol' Sandra Bullock, whom I havent seen produce a good film in quite some time, who does the thing she does best and shows us how it can be so beautiful to age gracefully. She has managed to take on a mature motherly figure role and yet, make boys fantasize about her at the same time (not that i do, but i would if i was a guy).

The performances by the others were great as well, and best of all, all these feel good fuzzy stuff is based on something that has happened around us. This is an awesome story that is born 'cos someone has a great heart to make a difference to people around her.